Ask Honey: How to Address my Son Verbally Abusing my Grandson?

Honey, While spending the night at my house, my 10 year-old grandson confided in me that his dad, my oldest son, verbally insults and swears at him daily. He began crying as he told me. I of course was shocked but comforted him and held him close. But my question is, how do I address this with my son. I cannot remain silent about this. How do I approach my son about this serious issue?

- Sandra


Dear Sandra,

You are right. In this case “silence is not golden.”

I think the first plan is to talk to your daughter-in-law, privately. Do not confront her. Calmly inform her of the situation and ask her to please explain to you, in adult terms, what is going on at home. Make certain to tell her you will keep her confidence. We don’t want your son to further verbal abuse your grandson or become upset with his wife. Once you have a clearer understanding of the situation you will have to make a decision to either talk to your son or inquire about a place to go to for guidance on how to handle this serious problem. Your grandson’s school may know of professional people to send you to for guidance.

- Honey