Girlfriends: Your Other Significant Others


By: Jordan Elizabeth

Spending time with friends is usually the first thing that’s put on the back burner when life gets stressful, especially when you’re in a relationship. (We’re all guilty of ignoring our friends a little bit once we find a boyfriend/girlfriend. Don’t act like you’re better than me.) But girl time is important! And I’m not just talking about girl time in the sense of getting loud at some bar that’s full of kids half your age drinking a boozy syrup out of a fish bowl. I’m talking quality time talking and laughing...and if that includes a fish bowl, no judgments!

I refer to my best friend as my “wife,” which is found to be only mildly humorous to my fiance (it’s just jealousy talking -- and perhaps the latent fear I’ll turn out to be a lesbian). But I think this label is indicative of what she is: the person I could (and do) spend massive amounts of time with and someone who feeds my soul in some way. I’m not just referring to the fact that your girlfriends are the ones you can complain to about your guy’s parents / snoring  / constant farting and the arguments you’ve had that maybe you shouldn’t share with others, but you have to tell someone or you are going to explode and/or end up on an episode of “Wives With Knives.” But yes, that does help.

And my fiance understands this and probably is thankful there is someone who can help me unleash my crazy that’s a safe (physical and emotional) distance from him. Spending time with other women can help keep the relationship you have with your man healthier. Blowing off steam to them can save you from saying nasty things to him (having an honest relationship does not mean you should share every thought in your head. Learned this one the hard way!). Plus, hearing about other people’s relationship issues can help put yours into perspective...or at least let you know that the struggle to clean up snack wrappers is real and shared. Sometimes understanding is all you need.

Finding the time to sit down and dish can be hard. But just like the romantic relationship you have, you have to work on your relationships with girlfriends too. I try and plan a girl’s date night once a week. To save money and the effort of dressing up to go out, we do a Shonda Rhimes night. We gather a few hours before Scandal starts to talk and connect, then we watch our favorite shows together. Fine, and drink a lot of wine in the process. But every good date night needs wine to get loosened up.

If you want to get out of the house (and out of your sweatpants), I tend to gravitate towards outings with an activity:

  • Dinner then catching a Chippendale’s revue. (It’s not a strip club so it’s fine!)
  • Bowling. Actually I hate bowling because I’m terrible at it. So maybe laser tag, if they let people over the age of 14 in.
  • A comedy show. This is especially good for that uptight friend that needs a two-drink minimum to have fun.
  • Seeing a movie and sneaking in a little booze. Sometimes the best and only way to watch a bad romantic comedy is a little sauced.
  • Play a game. Something like “Escape The Room” is fun and it builds teamwork! Like a ropes course without the fear of falling to your death while wearing that stupid little helmet.

So here’s to time with your best gals (clink clink). It’s not only a time to cut loose and have fun - it’s an integral part of your life as a whole. As they say...happy wife, happy life. And a wife who’s able to let her thoughts out in a safe space means a lesser likelihood of divorce -- just sayin'. But make sure your man has guy time, because this lady/man-bonding time goes both ways.

Are you texting your bestie now? I thought so.