By Lisa Copeland, Guest Contributor
I wasn’t always good at dating. In fact, back in the day when I was clueless about finding love, I made some major dating mistakes that truly kept me from finding the right guy for a very long time.
I want to share 3 of them with you in today’s blog because once I recognized what they were and I stopped doing them, well….my life with men and finding love after 50 changed BIG TIME!
Dating After 50 Mistake #1
Are you dating right after your last relationship has ended?
This mistake hurts your chances of finding love with the right guy.
Why? Because it's so easy to drag your unfinished baggage from the last guy right on over to the new guy when you haven’t taken some time to heal.
What does this look like on a date?
You interrogate a man to make sure he doesn’t have your ex’s faults.
And you talk about your ex – the good, the bad and the ugly – over coffee or drinks while you’re getting to know someone new.
Men will think you still have a thing for your ex.
And they chalk you up as a drama queen versus a good catch.
When a relationship ends, take some time to heal before you date.
Allow yourself to grieve over this loss even if you broke it off.
Go out with friends, get a manicure or pedicure, go to a new restaurant you’ve wanted to try or take a fun class.
Buy a lovely journal and write your thoughts in it. I love journaling and have done it daily for years.
You’ll find if you consistently write, you can discover a lot about yourself and the man you want in your life.
This phase can feel hard as you get used to being by yourself again, but it is a very good time for getting to know the real you that’s probably been hidden for a while.
Loving yourself totally and entirely again sends vibes into the world of a happy, confident and openhearted woman.
This the type of woman men are looking to share their life with.
Dating After 50 Mistake #2
Dating when your confidence is low
Did your ex ever say anything that made you doubt yourself. . . causing you to forget how AWESOME you really are?
If so, you’re not alone.
At one time or another, we’ve all held onto someone else’s opinion as if it were our own.
Here’s the secret about what’s really going on here. . . whatever your ex said about you was only a reflection of something bad he felt about himself.
He just projected it onto you.
When you take others opinions in without checking in with yourself to see if they are true, you are dis-empowering yourself.
To feel empowered gain, you want to acknowledge that the story you’re telling yourself is your ex’s and not YOURS.
Doing this will help you get your inner glow back a lot quicker; as quality men are so unbelievably attracted to in women.
Dating After 50 Mistake #3
Taking the Fun out of dating
How long has it been since you flirted?
Probably quite a while, but it’s the best tool you have for getting great guys to notice you online and in the real world.
I get it. Flirting takes you way out of your comfort zone.
But, when you stay in your comfort zone you miss fantastic opportunities for attracting and keeping love.
You want to get comfortable with feeling uncomfortable.
Flirting again or maybe even for the 1st time in the second half of life can feel pretty uncomfortable.
But you want to do it cause it’s the best way to let a guy know you’re interested in him.
The biggest reason women have a hard time flirting is that they are worried about being rejected.
Or they’re not sure what to say to a guy.
When you have the tools that teach you step by step how to do this, flirting with men is FUN!
What are the biggest dating mistakes you’ve made?
Lisa Copeland - Author
Lisa Copeland is known as the expert on over 50's dating. She's the best-selling author of The Winning Dating Formula For Women Over 50 and her mission is to help as many women around the world as she can discover how to have fun dating and finding their Mr. Right after 50. To get your FREE Report, "5 Little Known Secrets To Find A Quality Man," visit www.findaqualityman.com.