Lately, I have been thinking back instead of living in the moment and looking forward. I always preach that living in the present is a gift, living in the past is over and living in the future is a waste of one’s precious time. 

However, lately the past, even with its hills and valleys, seems so much more pleasant and productive than the present. So much so that my mood or an experience inadvertently diverts my thoughts from the present to my past. 

As I continue to mention (I fear I am beginning to sound like a broken record) I have become lethargic due to the lifestyle in Elsewhere. It is another early morning in my beautiful Chicago. The sun is rising, the city is quiet, I watch the lake water moving slowly. Our home is still, all asleep. The mindful flute music I am listening to on my new Google Nest Hub Max takes me back in time.

THE YEAR- 2018

I recall walking in on my ultimate concierge. He was sitting at his desk. I blurted, “ Shelly, I have been married to you for 27 years and you have never heard me say that I am so very tired.”  

You see, dear reader, at this time in my life I was so busy, I was dizzy. I went on to tell him that everything and everyone else came first and I had forgotten about myself. I told him I wanted to get away and reconnect with the me in me. 

He stared at me with a worried and shocked look on his face. I continued with my drama-rama, dear reader!

“I would like to go to a mystical and magical place surrounded by the quiet of the day and night, and nature. A Shangri-La.”

He laughed at my drama, dear reader saying, “You are so dramatic!”

But I persisted. “ I feel I am wilting,” I remember telling him.

He now became speechless, this talkative husband of mine, finally asking, “Would you like me to take you to the Golden Door?”

My eyes opened wide and a big smile spread across my face. I remember telling him that I would adore that. 

Just then I recall another sign to point me in the right direction: my iPhone rang. It was Leila, my manicurist, reminding me I had an appointment in 15 minutes. The one weekly pleasure I gave myself and I had to be reminded with a phone call! Something was not right. I had lost my way.

 

A LIFESTYLE OUT OF BALANCE

My health and well-being used to be a top priority. Rarely did I miss a day on my treadmill. I had a quiet breakfast with my Ultimate Concierge. I took my pooch for early morning walks that ended with a run up the Museum of Contemporary Arts 25 steps. Once at the top we would plop down, my pooch nestled tightly into my body, to watch the world go by below. Taxis and buses and people racing while we relaxed in our aloneness. I was very happy. 

I escaped into great novels and talked on the phone to girlfriends. When I shopped at the market, it was with deliberation. I wrote my stories, I took my time in planning my calendar; now, I’d forgotten to send back a reply to a celebration. My life was out of balance and I knew it.

BE DELIBERATE

It occurred to me that I needed to slow down (now I need to speed up!) and calm down to figure out how to combat the negatives that were dismantling my life. At the Golden Door, I accomplished the mission. 

There, I was deliberate. I knew the lack of nourishing the inner and outer me had taken a heavy toll. I knew who and what the culprits were. They don’t occur overnight. They build. You know that, too. My issue was to attack them with positive solutions and come up with a plan. I did accomplish this at The Golden Door.

Much of the week, I remember I spent time thinking about how not to be last on my hit parade. “What are my needs, what are my next steps? How could I live the life I needed without giving up everything else I loved?” These are the questions I asked myself.

I knew I had to commit myself to living a healthy, emotional, and physical lifestyle that suited me! That week at the Golden Door, I found my way.

MY SOLUTIONS – HOW TO HAVE IT ALL

I recall my thoughts and want to share them with you in case you are feeling like I was feeling at that time. 

I will:

• Block a few people and promos off my phone, emails lists, and text messages. I had never done that before.
• Employ a personal assistant. I had never done that before.
• Change our hurried breakfast to a calm experience. A morning routine that includes a talkative breakfast with my Ultimate Concierge. With Hawaiian and mindful music in the background (no tv) as we sip on fresh-squeezed orange juice and munch avocado, pomegranate seeds, a bowl of steel-cut oatmeal, etc… Not part of my present lifestyle.
• Add a monthly facial, lymphatic massage, wax, to my weekly manicure and monthly pedicure. I never took the time with consistency.
• I cut my own hair with my kitchen scissors whenever I am in the mood, but I decided I will have my hair done weekly because I love Colette, my hairdresser, and friend. Also because I have photoshoots and videos for my website, HoneyGood.com, and my Instagram channel @iamhoneygood. Never before.
• Work out an exercise routine that floats my boat; not the boat of others. 
• Take the time to smell the flowers!
• Constantly remind myself, “ If I am not content, fulfilled, and happy, how can I be good to all those I care for?” Caring starts with me. 

Looking back, four years ago, my Ultimate Concierge came to my rescue and I recall feeling so grateful. He understood what I was going through and afforded me the luxury of taking a week out of my life to listen to my needs. It worked.

DID I SUCCEED?

Yes! Yes! Oh yes it did! It is four years later and the list is still intact. The problem is I am intact but the world around me is frazzled! La de da. LOL.

Is it time for add ons to my list? Stay tuned for 2022. 

I want to leave you with this message: 

As I look back over the last four years, I have added these thoughts: I am an ‘empowered’ woman. I am an ‘enlightened’ woman. I have earned the right as a woman 50+ to live a luxurious life, one I aspire to. 

Not bad, right! I am smiling. 

I would love to hear how you make yourself a priority and live in the now. Let’s start a discussion in the comments. I love hearing from you!

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