I received an email from a woman asking me to tell my story. More specifically, she was interested in learning about the road I chose to travel down the first year of my widowhood. It was a live interview, and I want to share it with you. Essentially, it is an intensely personal story about my secret to surviving widowhood.
How the podcast came to be…
An email arrived in my HoneyGood.com inbox that read, “Hi. My name is Helen Mitternight and I saw your Huffington Post blog on widowhood. I am writing to ask if you would be interested in being featured as a guest on my podcast, Keep it Juicy, a live interview-format podcast for people over 50. In a casual interview I talk about what lessons our experts can offer. Please let me know if you have any questions. I am excited to share your story.”
The interview was ad lib; no questions were sent in advance. I remember sitting at my desk in total silence, waiting for her call.
As I sat at my desk, I had mixed emotions. I was feeling apprehensive about doing a podcast; I had only done two in the past. But I put my nervousness on the back burner because I wanted to share the healing process I chose when my husband died suddenly while I was in my forties.
Here, in my voice, is my story of how I faced the first year of my widowhood.
LISTEN THE TO THE PODCAST HERE.
For those of you who are recently widowed, I want you to know that you are not alone. For those of you who were widowed years ago, you will hear in my story, in my voice and in my honest sharing, that I get it. I understand how you feel. The pain subsides with time, but it is always there, just under the surface and, unfortunately, quite easy to access.
There is, however, healing and hope for those seeking it. I found mine by opening up and sharing stories with you, my very dear readers, as well as through living out my emotions, embracing life and even loving again after a most devastating loss.
The secret to surviving widowhood is nuanced and complicated… it is different for each widow. However, I hope my story helps you to know, most importantly, that you will survive and even, someday, find joy again.
If you enjoyed this story, please subscribe to my email list. Once a day, when I post a new story, you will receive it in your inbox. SUBSCRIBE HERE.
If you have something to say about this story… let’s talk! Share your opinions either in the comments below or on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram.
Enjoyed your podcast on widowhood, so sorry for your loss. Could you do something on going through a divorce at 65? I never thought I would be in this boat at my age. Thank you Nicole
I will do that for you, though I have not experienced it first hand I know many people close to me who have. Warmly, Honey
I totally agree with your comments, Honey. I lost my love suddenly 4 yrs ago after 53 years together. I really needed to be alone with my thoughts to find out who I was. It took me two years to adjust. people kept asking if I was going to go away on a trip. I really just needed to be in my home with all my memories..
It took me two years to be able to read a book.I listened to my heart and my head and that is how I survived. I hope you are finding joy in your life. Warmly, Honey
Not widowed, but grieving the lose of a relationship. I wrote this poem.
UNZIPPED. Now a gaping hole Where my heart sits exposed. Once a loving, caring envelop Clothed me warm and tight. Protecting me from the world’s vicissitudes Filling up that hole. Now my quest Stuffing the cavernous space of abandonment Walking the path of barren landscapes. Endless sand dunes touched only by the wind. Deep abyss unlit by the sun’s healing light. Oh, how my heart cries out. I walk alone Alone I walk. Searching, seizing the smallest comfort along the way. My destination? Address unknown. Belonging Street City of Love. Hope U.S.A.
I am very sad for you.There are no words.You have to go through the grieving process.Keep writing your thoughts. Keep a Journal.I don’t know your lifestyle, but possibly join a group that you find fulfilling. A book group, since you enjoy writing? Time does heal. I promise.Warmly, Honey
You do a wonderful job every day, You seem to be able to place yourself in other people’s shoes and you always come across so kind and caring. Just wanted you to know.
How lovely of you to write such a warm and loving message to me. Just wanted ‘you’ to know. Warmly, Honey
Thank-you for your thoughts & help. This journey is new to me and it feels like I have lost myself & my life. So depressed & lonely. My family has not been much help to me at all & I have had to go through this alone. My sister doesn’t understand how awful this feeling is. Tells me to get stronger & I’ll be ok. I cry alone most nights & wonder how to fill the empty space in my heart and life. I was SO glad I found your site as I need help & support.
I know how you are feeling. I was widowed. You are going to have to go through the pain of grieving. It is normal and natural. Be kind to yourself. Do not listen to others. Listen to your heart – it knows. Trust me. Also, consider joining my private free facebook group: Widows Support Group- Women healing together. The women are wonderful, kind and compassionate. Warmly, Honey