Please don’t live your life according to what others think you should do. Live according to what your heart and mind tell you to do. In other words, be an authentic woman—to yourself, be true. You are capable of tapping into your authenticity, resilience, and hopefulness. If you do, you can cope when beset by life’s complications.

A few days ago, I sat with my grandson. “You are strong, Honey,” he told me. His comment jolted me because I thought he viewed me differently and saw me as kisses and comfort. I didn’t say anything, though his comment played in my mind.

The next day, I received a text, and again, he used the word “strong” when referring to me.

I answered my grandson, “I am a mix of many things, and strength is in the mix. It comes from learning early in my life that resilience was important. As I matured, I realized that hopefulness was just as important as resilience. And, even later, I learned the importance of being authentic and genuine to my feelings.”

Sweet reader, resilience, hope, and authenticity are three critical factors that give a woman strength.

Let’s be honest. Life is a rollercoaster, with ups and downs and people trying to disrupt your peace. Some situations can throw us off balance, setbacks can shake us, and society can seem chaotic. With the promise of hope, one’s mind fosters optimism, leading one to the finish line. You must see the glass as half full.

Many women struggle because they don’t know how to harness their ability to be authentic. They go with the flow, listening to others.

How Does a Woman Harness Her Authenticity?

Remember, believing in yourself harnesses authenticity and nourishes emotional power.

Stand up for your beliefs, ask the right questions, and say no without apology.

How can you accomplish this? It’s hard to change after age 50, but you can change when you have the will. Take a position on something and see it to the end. Try, try, try. Stay calm. Do not be swayed by anything or anyone. Believe in yourself. You will feel your sense of genuine pride.

Since my husband became ill, I have had to take positions he took the lead in handling. Since having to take the lead, I have failed myself countless times. I knew what to say or do, but I needed help in the negotiation. I had a hard time being authentic. After each event, I was upset with myself. I have had to teach myself how to negotiate to get what I deserve. Trust me, I am learning. I am learning to be my authentic self.

Remember, we all have missing pieces to fill into our psyche. We can learn to be mindful and transform our thoughts.

A Hopeful Woman Is an Enlightened Woman

Hopefulness is a form of enlightenment. It is highly nourishing for one’s spirit. It is optimism at its best.

When faced with a new challenge, I always imagine a hopeful outcome. This hopefulness uplifts me and my ability to be resilient, which helps me complete a task.

But life is filled with complications. When confronted with complications, you must turn to hope to inspire you to move forward.

I have also learned to coexist with unresolved problems by discovering ways to find joy. You can, too, as long as you have hope.

I love dining out, but our evening entertainment routine has changed. We used to go out for dinner six nights a week, often with friends. We used to be on the A list. My husband’s illness changed the dynamics. I understand. I am not upset. It is part of life.

I cherish being with my hubby. He is enough to fill me. But that is not the point. The point is: With my hopeful attitude, I found the solution that brings us more joy.

A Story of Resilience and New Beginnings

A few weeks ago, I mentioned to my ultimate concierge that it would be great to dine once a week at different ethnic restaurants. It has been an educational and exciting journey!

Two weeks ago, we ate at a Filipino restaurant. Last week, we devoured Thai food at a charming Thai restaurant. This week, we will dine on savory Middle Eastern food, maybe Ethiopian. We will live as fully as possible. I can see the bright side of every situation because I thrive on hope. And you should be, too.

See your cup as half full; never half empty.

The Art of Bending With Empowerment

Be a Resilient Woman

You are more resilient than you may realize.

After age 50, you are at a stage of life when you can identify with what does not grow older but grows more robust. It is your resilience to weather your storms.

You have learned some form of resilience over a lifetime of trials. It is not easy to be resilient when you are facing trauma, stress, and different types of loss. It is time to trust your actions after age 50, put the mettle to the peddle, and soar forward for the next 50 years. Because if not now, when?

“Sweet reader, resilience, hope, and authenticity are three critical factors that give a woman strength.” – Honey Good

Your ability to learn to be resilient comes from the outside, an event. The event forces you to plan a survival strategy. You ask yourself: How can I survive?

Begin by accepting the problem and having positivity. Ask yourself how to make the situation better.

Here Are Two Examples:

My friend’s husband has Alzheimer’s. He would ask the same question repeatedly—within a short time frame. She was beside herself. I said to her, “Tell yourself you know he is not repeating himself to upset you. He cannot help it. This thought will make you more patient and sad for him.” It worked.

A woman on HoneyGood asked if she could phone me about her daughter. The daughter was coming to visit after being estranged from her family. The mother was afraid there would be a big argument. I asked her if there was a project they enjoyed doing together. She told me, baking. I told her to have all her baking goods in the kitchen, and they should bake together. It worked!

It is essential to engage yourself in valued activities. A new experience that gives you uplifting feelings.

My husband is ill. Every day I am sad, yet I strategize ways to uplift myself by adding a new purpose that I am passionate about. My sadness does not lessen, but personal fulfillment feeds my spirit and brings me joy.

I have had to adjust to my new way of life, and I am happy to say I have because I am a resilient woman. I am always hopeful, authentic, and strategic about my needs. Amen. Amen.

Honey Good is a mentor for women, empowering them to live vibrant and visible lives after 50. Please join her in her private Facebook groups, Women over 50: Celebrate Visibility, Widow Support Group: Women Healing Together, and Estranged Mothers and Grandmothers: Millions Strong. To inquire about working with Honey, please email her at collabs@honeygood.com.