The last story that I wrote regarding Zelda, Geraldine and Bullyista was going to be the final chapter, but surprisingly, and yet not surprisingly, the saga continued. As the narrator of their story, I never thought there would be the need for a third blog post. After all, I had planned on the last story ending on a high note. Geraldine and Zelda reconciled their problem and the friendship remained intact. However, I came to the conclusion that it was important to play it out. After all, it was a rather big surprise…
Background on the Stories of Bullyista
For those of you who did not read the first two stories, it is important to read them before you read story number three. The first story is titled, Peer Pressure After the Age of 50: It Does Exist And You Can Make a Difference. The second story is titled Act 11: Zelda, Geraldine & the One and Only …Bullyista.
For a little background, there were five women in a card group. One woman in the group, Bullyista, bullied the other women. Zelda was the scapegoat that day and took a stand, telling Bullyista she could not speak to her in that manner. Instead of the group asking Bullyista to leave the game because of her bad card manners, they asked Zelda, though they told Zelda they knew she was innocent. Zelda’s close friend, Geraldine, was chosen to make the call. A week later Zelda called Geraldine and asked her to have lunch. They met and reconciled.
The Sisterhood of Honey Good
After I wrote my two stories, the community of women who read my blog posts on either www.honeygood.com or on Facebook commented on my story. Their comments were so wise I decided to print some of them. Here is what you, my dear readers, had to say.
Regarding Act I:
Sheri said, “If my close friend was the bully (Even though I can’t imagine I would be friendly with this kind of person) I would talk with her privately and share my feeling about what she was doing. And I would probably step back from the friendship. If my friend was the object of bullying, I would support her taking a stand for herself. If she didn’t, I would take a stand for her.”
Francine stated, “Indeed, it does exist! I lived in a 55 plus neighborhood for about 7 years and I could tell you lots of stories. I thought by the age of 50 or over, people would be all grown up, but apparently, that is not true. I have gone to the other extreme and have become a recluse of sorts.”
Akaisha shared, “This story has left me speechless. Yes, I am familiar with (negative) Peer Pressure – at any age. And as you say, it is best to connect with one’s heart first, before speaking. This can be difficult to do when our emotions are riled up. For me, sometimes it takes a day or two for me to calm down. But when I do, and when I connect with my heart, I always know what to do — what will be best… for me.
There is NO excuse for bullying. Ever.
Apparently, Bullyista has gotten away with it throughout her life, and that is why she continues to do it. Perhaps others are afraid they will become her next “victim” and so they stay quiet. I don’t know the reasons…
I also agree with your Forgiveness message – and your encouragement to connect with our inner voice (the heart). It is where our strength lies.”
Carole replied, “Ridiculous not to put your foot down. If the majority agree that Bully is out of line, then they all should leave the card came saying that it’s no pleasure to be around someone that is being childish.
Bully might be mad and cut them out of her life, but it sounds like it would be a better atmosphere for the group. Maybe a season away from her card playing friends would cool her down and realize she was being sophomoric. We are much too old to be playing high school “you’re in, you’re out ” games.”
Regarding Act II:
Glenda commented, “Great story! I had to have a face to face with an old friend and it did no good, so I realized where I stood, and had to end the friendship. It still bothers me, that I thought so much of her as a friend and she didn’t consider me in the same way.”
Lynn replied, “Thank you for Act 2. You make excellent points here, as how many times have I dismissed people for their bad behavior without giving them the chance to explain further. I will think about this next time if it happens, and try to let them give their perspective on their behavior. Yes, I love your 3 lessons to be learned. Thank you!”
Act III: A Big Surprise
Zelda returns a phone call to Geraldine five days after reconciling their ‘close’ friendship.
The following is the conversation between the two women:
“Hi, I’m returning your call. It’s your girlfriend, Zelda! How are you?
In a very angry and uncontrolled voice, Geraldine says to Zelda, “You are out of our card game!”
Zelda, shocked and caught completely off guard, asks, “Why?”
Geraldine goes on to say, “The entire club knows the story, and one of the girls walked up to me laughing and called me, Geraldine!” (The names in my story had been changed to protect the guilty!)
Zelda listened to the voice of her ‘dear and close’ Geraldine, thought a moment then said to her, “You must have a ‘leak’ in your card group because I never told a soul.”
There was silence on the other end of the phone as Geraldine began to wonder who could be the ‘leak’ in her group of ‘loyal and close’ friends.
Zelda knew if Geraldine knew, Bullyista knew. She laughed at the irony of it all.
What Do You Think?
Have you ever found yourself in a similar situation? It’s not too late to share your experiences! I will await your further intelligent comments, darlings, and of course, as I always do, I will reply.
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