February is the month of love. The theme of this story centers around positive (self-love) and negative (narcissism) self-love. Have we gone too far with self-love? Did you know that February 13th is self-love day and that the entire month of January is self-love month! 

The younger Baby Boomer generation is known as the Me Generation who went on to produce the ME ME generation. Couple that with life in Elsewhere — self-protection at all costs! Are we living through a ME ME epidemic?

Wouldn’t it be nice to revert back to the day when we gave unto others and ourselves. That is the true definition of self-love. I wish we were living through an Us epidemic instead of a Me one.

The month of February should be the month for mothers and grandmothers to reach out to their adult children and grands and preach the real meaning of self-love. Self-love is not narcissism.

Here are a few thoughts.

THE TRUE MEANING OF SELF-LOVE

I read this in an article: Self-love is the unconditional support, self-care and compassion you give yourself that ultimately results in good health, self-esteem, happiness and well-being.

Personally, I think that self-love means self-care: the regard for one’s well-being spiritually, physically and psychologically. Self-love deepens your positive relationship with the you in you. 

Self-Love is:

• Self-respect and self-esteem.
• High value and worth
• Being authentic
• Self-discipline
• Responsibility
• Purpose
• Integrity
• Acceptance
• Taking the High Road
• Self-protection

And self-love is gratitude!

NARCISSISM IS NOT SELF-LOVE!

An inflated sense of self combined with a total lack of empathy. These women cannot love themselves. A narcissistic personality loves taking selfies! 

Narcissism is exploitation, empathy impairment, and entitlement. 

Narcissism is power-oriented and arrogant.

A TRUE NARRATIVE

The buzzword ‘self-love’ is on everyone’s lips. It is all about ‘me, me, me’ is the hit phrase. Or, ‘It is time for me.’ In my view, a person who focuses on others, as well as themselves, leads a far happier existence. This is practicing self-love, self-care.

I mentioned self-love is self-protection. This is something I added to my list because of our living conditions in Elsewhere. 

I know I am personally obsessed with surviving in America. Have I gone too far with this form of self-love? Maybe. Can I help it? No. And, it is the month of February, Valentine’s Day, the month to think of others. And I do, but not to the extent that I once did. My mind is on survival.

This is scary. I miss that carefree feeling of running out to Papyrus for cards. A store that is now closed in my once beautiful Chicago. I miss running into small boutique shops for gifts for my loved ones. They are now out of business. Now I go into large stores without customers and less inventory and sales personnel standing around twiddling their thumbs. Depressing!!! 

PROTECTIVE SELF-LOVE

And to make matters worse, I am so busy worrying about what I fear is happening in my Country and may happen to my family that I miss things! Like making that phone call to family and friends. And I miss my time buying gifts and cards for Valentine’s Day because I am obsessed with survival. Have I gone too far with this type of self-love? I don’t think so. In many ways, I am a dreamer and in important ways I am a realist.

There has been a reset in the American psyche, a mix of fear and survival because we are beset with a mix of ‘the known and the unknown.’ 

I think it is ok to practice a protective type of self-love. It is not selfish to want to protect ourselves and those we love from witnessing the ugliness in our world. Self-protection is now more than ever our new reality. This form of self-love will keep us safe. 

There is one thing I can do and will do and seldom not do, and that is to promise myself during this month of love to never forget to take the high road. 

TAKE THE HIGH ROAD 12 MONTHS OF THE YEAR. THAT IS SELF-LOVE 

Personally, I do not like confrontations with people. I prefer taking the high road just as I prefer gazing at a calm sea. I don’t like to bend down and lower myself — especially to people who throw stones. Only a small part of the population are stone throwers. The majority of us prefer to come from reason, from rationality.  

Do remember that everyone has personal viewpoints and at times, is tainted by their personal clogged filters. If there are people in your life whose filters are too clogged and take the low road, clean house. This is self-love.

I do believe when taking the high road that, one gets further. Kindness counts. Unkindness does not. And, one’s good will always brings joy ‘unto themselves.’  This is self-love.

February is the month of love. February 14th is Valentine’s Day.  It is the day to express your love to others. It is a day to share lessons with your adult children and grands on the true meanings of positive self-love qualities.

Valentine’s Day and the month of February is the day and month to forgive, forget and look inside yourself. Examine your behavior and make some changes if you are inclined. 

If you can accomplish this feat, and it is a feat, you are gifting yourself self-love — a personal Valentine to yourself. So, make it a point to study what taking the high road is really all about. 

To refresh your memory, taking the high road means doing the right thing even when it is not easy. In other words, let the other person take the low road. That person has probably wronged many people. And, eventually, their road will be far tougher than yours.

You have several days to put your thoughts together and gift your family your perspective on the meaning and message of positive self-care.

If you enjoyed this post, please subscribe. You might also enjoy my post: Surprising Things the Sun Taught Me About Friendship. 

What are your thoughts about the idea of self-love today? Have we taken it too far? Not far enough? I’d love to hear from you in the comments!