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As a woman who has lived through many passages and learned through my larger than life experiences (positive and negative), I’ve discovered how to take a big empowering bite out of life.

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How ‘I Don’t Buy It’ Is Its Own Joy

Before I expound on my personal convictions on the topic of joy, I want to expound on how uplifting and joyful it is for me to say, “I don’t buy it.” How many of you have the ability to express your true feelings that go against the grain of your family, peers, or society? How many of you are ambivalent? 

I would guess many of you either go along with the flow, or you live an emotionally pent-up life. Just a thought for you to ponder because this is not a way to own joy. 

When you have learned how to voice your opinion and are true to yourself, you will feel that puff of joy. When you are under the control or in the power of another/others, you fail.   

Sure it is scary to go against the roar of the crowd or the roar of one, but your personal value is worth the fight. Just my two cents. In other words, “I don’t buy it” is joy!

“Joy is Enchantment”

This morning as I opened the kitchen cabinet door to take out one of my memory mugs (my Ultimate Concierge and I puchase two mugs in each city we visit), my eyes landed on my mug from Dublin. The first thought on my mind was recalling when I gave one of the pair away to my closet girlfriends who lives across the hall. She is Irish. 

I recall the day I did this. When I opened the cabinet and said, to myself, “ I am going to give one of these to Patti. I felt so happy. I recall feeling a puff of joy.

The mug is white and green and says: “Where ever you go, whatever you do, may the Luck of the Irish be there with you.” 

I felt joy this morning, a feeling of great pleasure and happiness because I recalled the look on her face and my feelings. 

As I sip coffee from the other Irish mug this morning, I glance at it with a feeling of comfort, knowing I have the capacity to give, and this brings another puff of joy. 

I love the word joy. Saying the word joy is delightfully charming and enchanting. Isn’t it?

going grey, grey hair after 50

“Joy can take time. The longer you muddle in the dirt, the less long term joy you will experience.”

So, dear reader, joy can be so negligible, so fleeting, and uncomplicated. But also so powerful because it happens throughout your day. Intermittent puffs of joy sweeten the value of every day.

“Oh, the pen is actually where I last placed it!”  

“The sky is so blue.”  

“My family is thriving.” 

“Oh, the pants I need for tonight came back early from the cleaners!” 

So, take pleasure in your small uncomplicated joys throughout your day. And when the day is done, close your eyes, thinking about the joys you experienced instead of dwelling on the negatives. It is my belief they balance one another. 

Long Lasting Joy…

 

I know finding long-lasting joy for many of you can be difficult. Especially when the world itself is certainly not joyful. 

I read everything that I can get my hands on concerning the plight we are facing in our country. I am furious that a few are running and trying to ruin the lives of the many. “How dare they disrupt our way of life,” I think to myself. 

I have allowed the awfulness in Elsewhere to rob me of joy because I am not only angry, I am fearful of what lies ahead for my family and yours. Our security.

You Have to Take the Stairs… Not Ride the Elevator to Find Joy

I have been thinking and thinking, yes I have been huffing and puffing up the stairs (no longer riding the elevator) to find joy among the rubble.

By the way, I first mentioned the idea of “taking the stairs” in this post, How to Find Joy in 2023, and I encourage you to read it! 

I know the feeling of joy also comes from studying your options and then taking action. Joy can take time. The longer you muddle in the dirt, the less long term joy you will experience. 

Therefore, It is not a puff of joy, it is a mental action that requires one to take a problem and turn it into a sound soulution. Only then will you find joy in the fact that you accomplished a feat. Joy is comforting.

Elsewhere Will Not Rob Me of Joy

For almost two years, I have been searching and researching ways to ease my life in Elsewhere. I live in the middle of the city of Chicago. Law and order is irrelevant; people going to the office to work is no longer proper. Buildings in my once beautiful Chicago are empty, and shops near the buildings no longer have customers. The streets need repair; the state laws are getting scarier and scarier. My beautiful Chicago is in a state of ruin. Elsewhere’s politics has tried to rob me of my joy.

Two long years of ‘climbing the stairs’ by asking the advice of others and reading about our options. Of having long discussions with my Ultimate Concierge, our accountant, our money managers, and our friends has finally led to a solution. I am feeling a long puff of joy!

This is why climbing the stairs is worthwhile. 

You have two options when you find yourself being robbed of long-lasting, joy. You can sink or swim. Despair after a woman’s age of 50 should not be in your life. Climbing the stairs is the only solution. It is tackling a problem and huffing and puffing into a clear and concise decision. 

A True Story to Ponder

Here is another true story that happened yesterday in our beautiful condo-in-the-sky.

I asked a friend of ours this question.

Me: When Hitler came to power would you have stayed in Germany or left? I swear to you I knew what he would say! I went on to tell him that he could not think about his answer, he had to listen to his heart and tell me if he would stay or he would leave. 

Him: I would have stayed.

Me: Why?

Him: Because I would not know what I would find in a new country and I am stubborn.

He would stay because he was afraid of the unknown and stubborn. Fear would stop him and his fear would have killed him and his family. He is a Jew. 

My Ultimate Concierge pipped in: I would think about staying but Honey would not stay. And, half laughing he said, “ She would convince me to leave, fast.” I would.

I was shocked by our friend’s ‘reason’ for staying in Germany but not by his answer.

What Joy Has To Offer

When you climb the stairs, do your homework, joy will find you! You will feel relief, pride in yourself, a new commitment that will have positive results, and peace.

Every major choice we make has consequences. When you climb the stairs, you are sending yourself a call to action. The right call will bring joy. So take your time, no fast moves, talk to others you admire and trust (that is hard to find in today’s world, so be leary) and listen to your heart. 

And—then act. Even if it is outside the box of your experiences and expectations. When it is right you will feel it so push, GO! Oh… the joy you will experience. 

These major choices come to us all throughout our lives. 

Do we move? Do we stay? What if we leave our job and start a new endeavor? Do we get divorced? Do we change accountants? What about switching doctors? And, on the lighter side, do we buy one expensive coat or buy three for the price of one? 

I take pleasure in waking up with a fresh palette and knowing at the close of the day, I will have found several small puffs of joy. I wish you the same. Find your little puffs of joy where you can and be sure to acknowledge them. Dwell on joy, darlings. I am smiling.

If you enjoyed this story, please subscribe to my email list. When I post a new story, you will receive it in your inbox. You might also enjoy my post: How a Year of Problems Led to Joy in the New Year.

Do you stand up and speak up for what you believe in? Do you find it easy to accept and appreciate small puffs of joy? Please share in the comments!

February 19, 2023

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  1. I recently found your website and just adore you. I have been working in my small business of helping women 50+, live happier and healthier lives. I survived breast cancer this year and want to focus more on those women who are (have dealt with) dealing with the same by using self-care, including EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique)/Tapping, that changed my life for the better. Just not getting anywhere with sales. Everyday is a learning experience. Your writing has encouraged me to continue, to teach what I believe can change your life and give you joy.. not listening to my sister who thinks it’s basically ridiculous. I continue to learn how to reach out to receive clients… ones who alter my ideal. Do you have any words of wisdom on building my dream business?
    Thank you, Honey!

    • Susan Good says:

      So very happy to have you at Honey Good. I started my own business and looking back these are my words of wisdom. Love what you do. Hard work.Determination. Look forward to hearing from you again. Warmly, Honey

  2. Nancy Slate says:

    I do share my beliefs and my reasoning. My perspective is often very different from my peers. However, I try not to try to impose my ideas on others. I respect the right to disagree politely. I only get hostile if I feel bullied!

    • Susan Good says:

      You are a winner. You are true to yourself. You are a lady. You take a stand when it comes to bullying. I am smiling. Warmly, Honey

  3. cec says:

    yes! I stand up for what I believe in. I am very active in animal rights and received alot of push back from friends and family when it came to my campaigning against factory farming and mistreatment of animals used for food. They do not need to be treated so poorly even if they are being raised for food.
    I also agree with you about how our cities have gone down in the past few years. I loved going to Chicago, NYC, Portland and now am fearful to have a layover in those cities. I am not afraid to state to friends and family “why” I think this has happened in the past few years. I am hopeful and prayerful that things will turn around soon so that our future generations have a peaceful world to live in.

    • Susan Good says:

      I applaud what you are doing and saying. You are a woman of action. Me, too! It feels good when www are true to ourselves. Warmly, Honey

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