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NO SHADE, NO BUTTERFLIES, NO FLOWERS: WE TURN INSIDE

Honey GoodThis past Tuesday, while grabbing my coat, I excitedly announced to my Ultimate Concierge, “I am running downstairs to the Farmer’s Market!” 

The market sets up in front of the Museum of Contemporary Art every Tuesday from June through October. It is across the street from our condo in the sky. 

“Not so fast Mrs. Good,” said Michelle, my helper. “The market is gone until next summer.”  

All of a sudden reality set in on this gorgeously sunny November day.

No more leaves to give me shade, no more butterflies to make me smile, no more flowers to bring me joy. November is the month I will have to spend more time radiating from within myself and the four walls of our home. 

“I won’t let that be hard on me,” I say to myself. “Because I will rise to the occasion of dreary days. I’ll do this by making plans, setting new goals, and going with the flow as best as I can.”

Not to sidetrack, but one of the main reasons I can rise to occasions with purpose is the women I have chosen to surround myself with over the years.  

Your mind is a flurry of constant activity. It is up to you to charge it with positivity and then let it rest. This is so you can daydream of things you desire and then allow it to sleep well. So you have the energy to get out there and make what you want happen; remembering this is not always easy. 

The Feminine Mystique

Yesterday, I had a call from a friend I greatly admire. Later that day, when resting, I daydreamed about other types of women who have passed through my life. I don’t think I consciously thought about the different types: young, vintage, sad, bright, not too bright. The rich in emotional wealth and poor in character, funny, sad, visible, and invisible. There are the uppers and downers, good-hearted and real witches, and even some bitches. 

Think about it. From the women in our families to friends, to women you work with. To the women you buy from or that serve you in some capacity. By this stage in our lives, we could all write a book on the feminine mystique!

We all have many fantastic women in our lives. Some stay and some pass through. Those that stay I call, ‘keepers.’ These women in some manner enhance my life. They leave a footprint. 

After you read my musings on a few of my special ‘keepers,’ get up your energy. I entreat you to take your time to call a special woman to tell her how grateful you are for her friendship. And also for her optimism, warmth, and kindness of heart. 

I will share my stories of a few women who left their footprint on my life. They all possess important qualities that draw them to me. And they rise to the occasion, they set goals, and they have learned to go with the flow of life; just like the seasons. 

1. “Don’t expect anything from anyone and you will never be disappointed.” 

My loving and kind-hearted friend said this to me on a day when I was having doubts. This sentence, which I had never heard, rocked me into reality. I recall feeling my body go into a state of what I can only describe as ‘luxurious tranquility.’

The phrase was harsh and her words hit me but I immediately got her matter-of-fact message. Family members, friends, and others are going to disappoint you. Put everything into perspective before you have a meltdown or a tizzy fit. Weigh their situation and your expectations. Hopefully, your reality will kick in and you will know how to handle it. 

2. “I am sick and tired of dealing with women who have qualities that don’t bring anything to the table. So today, I added a new word to my vocabulary-DELETE.”

This was a quote from yet another friend that stood out to me. We were talking on our iPhones. All I could envision was the delete key on my laptop and my finger hitting DELETE. One little word said it all. I had an inner ‘ah ha’ moment that I kept to myself after I told her how wise she was. That day I made up my mind that I would spend quality time only with women who mirror my values and that I would cleanse my life of anyone toxic. 

3. Her style was French. My style was American. 

“American women wear a black suit with black bag and shoes or a white dress with white shoes. Don’t dress like that anymore, Suzi. Treat your shoes and handbags as your accessories.”

It was a spring day in Paris when my friend said this to me. She was wearing a light pinstripe grey suit, carrying a pink Kelly handbag, and wearing pink shoes. She was elegant. I was dressed in a grey suit, grey handbag, and strappy grey shoes!

I love what she taught me so I am passing on her message to you, dear reader. Sharing my thoughts with you is something that brings me joy and I am attracted to women who want to share their information with me. 

4. “I love the silence of the night.”

It was in the middle of the night several years ago. I was sitting with my laptop at 4:00 am sending out many emails to girlfriends. I had jet lag (that is how long ago it was!) Unbelievably, I heard back from all seven of them within five minutes! I emailed them back asking why they were awake at 4:00 am. 

To this day, I have not forgotten one girlfriend’s email, “I love the silence of the night.”

I learned from her that silence is an art form. We live in an age of speed and nothing is more revitalizing than slowing your mind and body through silence. Truthfully, I love the silence of the day and the night. It is a tonic. 

5. “Keep a journal and pencil next to your bed.” 

“Every morning before you start your day, write down one or more reasons to be grateful.” A woman salesperson said this to me as she fitted me with shoes. “What a marvelous way sweet reader to start your day.” 

It has been proven that grateful people are happy people. 

All this comes back full circle to my start of this musing. I am grateful for my friends and acquaintances. But also for the month of November as I go into my shell and smell the flowers from within. I often pinch myself and ask, “How did I, a small-town girl, from Kankakee by the Sea, get so lucky?”

How do you walk on the sunny side of the street when necessity brings us indoors? Let me know in the comments below or share your ideas on Facebook. Have a “Hear it from Honey question?” Email info@www.honeygood.com and let me know. All names will be confidential and questions will be answered by Honey Good.

Warmly, Honey

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November 4, 2021

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  1. Patti Ollivier says:

    I do much the same as you shared your journey with me this morning.
    Thank you for being a icon even at my life age 81.
    You bring a smile to me each morning when I see your blog on my iPhone.
    I also love you call America, Elseware.
    Blessings,
    Patti

    • Susan "Honey" Good says:

      Thank you so much for your kind words. I am smiling about your comment on Elsewhere! Have a blessed week-end. Warmly, Honey

  2. Meredith OLSON says:

    Beautiful words, Honey. I have felt the same thing when it comes to women. I now have been reaching out to women from my earlier life. They are warm, caring, and share love. We feel a strong bond even though we may live in different states and haven’t seen one another in years.

    • Susan "Honey" Good says:

      I am glad you found your ‘mirrored’ friends. I am glad you are feeling fulfilled. That is what it is all about. Sending smiles across the miles, to you. Warmly, Honey

  3. SG says:

    I buy a bunch of mums to bring color and a smile to an autumn day. Has anyone noticed the golden glow if autumn light?

    • Susan "Honey" Good says:

      Thank you for sharing. I notice ‘everything’ when it comes to my love of nature. It is truly spectacular. Thank you for sharing about the mums. Warmly, Honey

  4. Gina says:

    Each morning when I wake up, I think first of how grateful I am to still have my parents, who are 92 and 89, and who are celebrating 70 years of marriage next month. Then I count other blessings. But they are always first.

  5. Bridget says:

    I love this post. It’s so interesting to hear your views on friendship. (I too am a 4am devotee 🙂 the silence and quiet is very special.
    I often remember your phrase: “don’t expect anything from anyone….” it’s so true. Also the ‘delete’ button if necessary.
    I love uplifting and enlightening views on life, as I tend to be over analytical and an over thinker. I respond to your positive messages with meaning and great flair.
    B X

    • Susan "Honey" Good says:

      I am so flattered by your kind words. Remember: An over thinker is far better than an ‘under’ thinker! Don’t you think? So, enjoy who you are and love yourself. I am smiling. Warmly, Honey

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