Do you know how to show yourself love and cultivate personal happiness? There is only one you after all, don’t you deserve to be adored?

Darlings, you are at the stage in life when you probably have the time to indulge yourself. Do you feel you are egotistical, self-centered or self- absorbed if you take your time to “smell the roses?”

Many women feel trapped in their lifestyle after they are greater than 50. I don’t, because my mother and other women were my role models; they knew how to cultivate personal happiness, at times, against all the odds.

I watched, listened and learned from them. For those of you who did not have a role model and feel trapped and anxious to indulge in yourself, maybe I can lend a helping hand. Remember, you have MOXIE! Every woman does.

HOW I INDULGE MYSELF

Showering love on my ultimate concierge and my pooch, America brings me great satisfaction.

I pamper myself by soaking in a hot bath on a cold day and munching on popcorn and binge-watching two or more seasons on Netflix or Amazon Prime with my ultimate concierge.

My soul is soothed when I am building relationships with women of all ages and forming women’s groups.

Exploring nature every day is a balm.

I indulge myself exploring the world while watching National Geographic, and when I can, I hop on a plane and indulge in my wanderlust. Sentimentality and empathy for all things large and small brings me joy. I hang out with happy and interesting people and toxic and unhappy people (unless someone needs me).

I ‘dare myself to dare.’ I feel empowered by speaking my mind and reaching for the stars even when I am afraid. As a woman greater than 50, I am fearless walking out the door in the newest fashion or hottest color of red lipstick. I have earned the title of a woman with MOXIE! and so have you.

Why? Because at our age we are beautiful blooming flowers. We are no longer rosebuds. We know what makes us tick. You know what makes your heart sing. Indulge yourself in your dreams and goals so you lead an emotionally charmed life and show yourself love.

ASK YOURSELF WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY

Everybody has something that brings feelings of joy. Without a doubt, no two women are alike. Therefore, I want you to pull out your pad and paper and answer the two questions below.

1. What are five things in your life that give you joy that you are not doing now?
2. What changes are you able to make that will improve your lifestyle?

WHAT I THINK HOLDS WOMEN BACK

1. As little girls we learned how to indulge others.

We took care of our dollies and watched our mothers cater to our father, our siblings, other family members, and us. We were given an A+ by our mothers as the caregivers of others. Those are good reasons we continue to place ourselves on the back burner. We indulge in other’s needs over our own because we continue to think it is a selfish act to put ourselves first. Wrong! You deserve to show yourself love.

2. Identifying ourselves by our relationships.

Many of you have pigeonholed yourselves, and are identifying yourself by your relationships with your adult children. You have allowed yourself to be constant caregivers to them and your grands. Everything in moderation should be your rule of thumb. You should give love to them and but prioritize the time to love yourself.

3. Never learning to say “No”

Maybe you continue to say ‘yes’ to your extended family and friends when what you really want to say is a resounding, ‘no.’ Learn to say no. I know it takes courage. You will be respected for voicing your feelings. It will be refreshing, and you will feel powerful in taking a stand.

4. You are afraid to venture out.

This is not a weakness. It is natural to have mixed feelings when we change course. Focus on the reason you want to explore the unknown, and add the word, desire, to your vocabulary.

THERE IS ONLY ONE YOU, SHOW YOURSELF LOVE

Maybe you might consider joining Celebrate Life, my private online networking group. You will learn what other women are talking about and thinking about. Or…

• Make a monthly appointment for a pedicure or manicure
• Treat yourself to a massage
• Start going to the movies or join a book club
• Change your hairstyle
• Plan a summer trip with your grands, girlfriends, your spouse or significant other, or go solo. You may even want to join me on a travel adventure. Learn more here.
• Bring home a new pet
• Become a volunteer
• Read a new book
• Throw a party for any reason at all
• Add new accessories to your wardrobe or your home that bring you joy
• Take a course in how to handle money after 50
• Go back to college for the sake of learning
• Reconnect with old childhood friends

I could go on and on.

Write down ‘your’ five joys. Write down your five ‘needs’ that are attainable and will add more joy to your life.

Darling, question yourself and question your motives. Live into your answer. I assure you, it will work. If you will work to show yourself love…it will work.

How do you show love for yourself? How do you take care of you? Please share your thoughts with me in the comments section below.

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