Honey Good discusses dealing with upsets after 50

Some days it feels like everything in our lives is out of kilter. However, I believe there are ways to handle just about everything. By the time we are over 50, our lifestyle should provide us with tools to handle our upsets, but unfortunately emotions such as fear, anger and jealousy often take over. So what is the best way of dealing with upsets after 50?

Today’s topic came to me after watching, “The Crown,” this weekend with my husband. The royal marriage was not arranged — love brought Queen Elizabeth and Prince Phillip together.

Not even royals are immune to the complications of life’s disappointments. The queen and prince were faced with rigid laws of the monarchy and I think they could have adjusted their lives to live happily, but sadly, were clueless in how to handle their lifestyle.

I have a few ways to deal with my upsets, which like yours range from little nothings to big somethings. The big somethings for me would be family and illness. How do I handle my feelings of fear, sadness and anger? I use the following coping skills…

Coping skills for dealing with upsets after 50

I always transform my attitude into positive thinking. I tell myself nothing is going to last forever. I know without a doubt that sunshine will return to my life.

I have control. I can seek out the best help. I can walk away from a bad situation. I can control my actions and reactions. I have confidence.

I share my feelings. When I am upset, I talk. I do not smother my anger or sadness, nor do I hide my fears. I seek guidance from my husband and family. If someone in my family was ill, I would communicate to find the best care in order to have the best outcome.

There is a silver lining. This is my belief. I always look for one good thing that results when bad things happen. And I swear, I always find one.

I work out and enjoy nature. I use these avenues to stay healthy, enjoy the outdoor and have time alone with my thoughts. Spending time alone outdoors clears my mind. I do my best thinking and often live into my answer. Working out reduces stress and boosts happiness endorphins.

Where I struggle at dealing with upsets after 50

My biggest problem is not being able to accept what is out of my control. I know I cannot change another person’s behavior, but I wish I could. I know I cannot change my pooch Orchid’s health issues, but I would give anything if I could. I feel helpless and it is exhausting. So I am practicing “acceptance” because I have been told that will change my feelings of helplessness into feelings of resilience.

If you suffer from the same downside as I do, I hope I helped you. I have been working on this because I know nothing good happens by accident.

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